'A hidden gem': How Umi and Jacq came to live together

Short Statured on C Street is a brief podcast about flatting with a disability, by Umi Asaka and Jacq Ruth. Below is a transcript of the first part 'A hidden gem': How Umi and Jacq came to live together.

Jacq: Welcome to Short Statured on C Street with Umi and Jacq.

Olivia: I'm Olivia, the editor at The D*list and we're here to have a chat about what it's like flatting with a disability and living on C Street. So first up Umi and Jacq, do you wanna tell us where you're calling from.

Umi: So as we are calling from Ōtepoti Dunedin this morning.

Olivia: Is it cold? 

Umi: Yeah, it's pretty cool. 

Olivia: And you're calling from your flat, which you share together.

Umi: Yes, yeah.

Olivia: Give us a quick introduction about yourselves.

Jacq: Alright. So I'm Jacq. I'm 27, originally from Christchurch and I have achondroplasia, which is a form of dwarfism and I was diagnosed with ADHD at 22 and I am a student studying genetics at Otago.

Umi: And kia ora, my name is Umi, and I am a proud second generation disabled person. By that I share the same condition as my mum, and we are both wheelchair users. And currently I work as a disability researcher, and I am originally from Japan and moved to Aotearoa when I was 15 and I'm the same age as Jacq.

Olivia: Oh, and what do you do? During the week, Umi?

Umi: I work during the week, and I'm planning to study, going back to study next year doing my master's. So you’ll still find me on the computer even after work. And then on the weekends I go to the farmer's market and beach, and seeing people.

Olivia: So you two share a flat. Who else lives in the house?

Jacq: So we have 2 other flatmates, Emma and Pluto. Pluto is also a student. And Emma works at the Wildlife Hospital in Dunedin.

Umi: As a vet.

Olivia: Cool. And what's it like living in Dunedin?

Jacq: Chill, but nice like, not a lot goes on. And I kinda like it. 

Umi: Actually, when we dig into it, there can be quite a lot that goes on as well, which is a good thing about Dunedin because I think it's quite a hidden gem. I’ve lived here for all my twenties and I haven't left it because I do like it here, actually.

Jacq: Umi is very good at finding things to do, or people to see, or events happening.

Olivia: And it would have been quite a contrast moving from Japan.

Umi: Yeah, I had a cushion in between. I used to live in Whitianga in Coromandel Peninsula, that’s where I went to high school, so that was even smaller. There was only 4000 people. So moving from Tokyo to that was quite a big change. But from there to Dunedin, it was like coming back home.

Olivia: And how about you, Jacq? Did you grow up in Dunedin?

Jacq: So I grew up in Christchurch. I moved in 2016 for uni. Well, if we're going right back to the start, I was born in Papua New Guinea, and we moved to Christchurch when I was 2. But yeah, 90% Christchurch.

Olivia: So in this series we're gonna be looking at home. So tell me, what does home mean to each of you?

Umi: That is a difficult question, I think, because as a migrant and moving around places. Sometimes what home means can be different things that I feel like for me, who I live with, creates home like the people around me and my home more than the physical spaces, although I do really like the house and the place we are living in. So I'm feeling home now, I guess home means where I feel safe and rejuvenated. 

Jacq: Yeah, it's people and place. It’s where you walk through the door and sigh with relief. Where you can let your guard down for a minute and yeah, here is home. We have a really nice place, four bedrooms in south Dunedin. And I've been here since 2019.

Umi: We have a very sunny lounge, which is really nice and a must in Dunedin.

Olivia: That would be amazing.

Jacq: Umi is the fire bug because she's always by the fire if it's going, and she once got her feet a little too close to the fire, and melted her socks to the glass. 

Olivia: Oh, my gosh. Did you get your feet out safely?

Umi: Yes! When Jacq got home-

Jacq: There was a footprint on the glass. 

Olivia: Is it still there?

Jacq: No thankfully it’s gone, but it was really funny.

Olivia: And so how long have you both been living together now?

Umi: We actually hit the four year mark, just like one week ago.

Jacq: Which is bonkers.

Umi: It is bonkers, we could actually graduate with a degree. 

Olivia: A Bachelor of Flat Mates (laughs). In all that time, what’s one thing you’ve learned from each other?  

Umi: I've learned from Jacq, mainly boundaries (laughs). I have actually always grown up in a house like a flat or with a shared living situation. So my parents had flatmates growing up as well. So I've had more than 50 flatmates in my life. I think I counted all up but growing up I didn't have my own room. So we all kind of slept in any room that was available on that day. So a very unique living situation. And so I don't need boundaries, but Jacq is very, very boundaried. In order for us to live together in peace, I learned to know what boundary means and how to respect it to a workable degree.

Olivia: What are some specific ones that come to mind? I mean, I assume you don't share a room?

Umi: No, we don't. I guess, like in the beginning of us living together. I just brought people home all the time without any notice, and then people turn up without any notice. But now I know to let Jacq know at least an hour before. 

Jacq: You're pretty good at remembering, too. That was definitely an adjustment. Ironically, I've learned to relax a little bit around people coming around. There's kind of two things that I struggled with with having people randomly turn up, and one was, I'm a bit more on the introverted side, and two was, I always felt the need to play host, and now I no longer feel that need to play host. I'm relaxing into a little bit more of note, and Umi can entertain them. I don't need to do anything. I've learnt to go with the flow a little bit more, cause I'm very- I like rules. I like definitions. Very type-A. And yeah, I think I've learned to relax a bit more. I went down to Invercargill last week, and I stayed with a friend of a friend, and it was the first time I've rocked up to someone's house where I didn't actually know anybody and then stayed. And that was terrifying. I called Umi multiple times freaking out because it's just not something I do. But I think it's saying, like progress of, I have actually learned something because I was able to do that, but before, no, I never would have done something like that.

Olivia: That's so cool how the thing you've learned from each other, it's kind of related, but it's like the opposite. It's lovely. Cool. Well, that wraps up the first part of this series just to introduce you both, and where we’re looking at how you have adapted the flat because I'm always interested in those stories because adapting flats I've moved in have always been a bit of a challenge. And seeing how it works for you. But thanks for your time and talk soon.

Umi: Thank you. 

Jacq: Sounds lovely. See ya.

*Editor’s note: This podcast series was originally recorded in December 2023. A huge shoutout to Umi and Jacq for coming up with the concept for this podcast and their patience with us!

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